Its been busy around here!

Well it has been another busy Fall season around our house.

Jordan was back at it with his Football and was once again on the best team imaginable for him and our family. We have  grown to love our football family because they are such a wonderful bunch of people, his team play hard and did great. I am so grateful to have him on the team he has been on for the last 4 years. We couldn’t ask for better coaches and kids. Our coaches go above and beyond for these boys. They take a special interest in each and every one of those boys and it shows with the heart they show our children. God has blessed us with the amazing parents we have met and bonds we have built over these years and hopefully many more years to come. Thank you coaches, families and kids for playing hard, playing with heart and giving it your all. We love you!

14222142_1104786126225117_509225402490784968_n

Alyssa played Flag Football this fall as well and she cannot wait to join Tackle football like her brother next fall.

14409499_1111489352221461_6865843706902680924_o

Chris is working hard everyday and I am juggling a job, home, kids and college.

Yes folks you heard that right. I am now a college student at the lovely old age of 40. I have chose to go back to school and become a Nurse. My main goal is to help those in Drug and Alcohol facilities.  14716045_1132670180103378_9210517444444679844_n

I now spend a lot of time doing this ↑↑↑. But all in all I still make time for my kids!

I will try to keep up with the blog as much as I can and I hope I can get more info on here about How Alyssa and Jordan both are doing!

Bullying and your rights

I’m just going to put this out there because at the current time my son is going through this. Since October 8th of this year he has been bullied by a child at school and this child’s friends. HERE you can see the day he was assaulted by the child and since that day has endured ridicule, teasing, threats and more.

No Bullying (1)

I myself have gone to the school as well as my son has gone to the Principle and assistant Principle. Nothing has changed. Nothing is being accomplished. So here are the steps to take to get the ball rolling when your child is being bullied. (Well the steps I take anyways)

  • Go to http://www.stopbullying.gov/laws/federal/ and read up on what the Federal Laws are.
  • Go to your State on that first page of the Federal site and read up on your state laws. Ours happens to be Minnesota. http://www.stopbullying.gov/laws/minnesota.html
  • Print out both Federal and State laws. Highlight the areas that pertain to your child being bullied
  • Write down every incident, Keep detailed notes of who you spoke to and when bout each incident and what was told to you.
  • If it continues. Go over the school itself head and contact the Superintendent of your district, be sure you have all your notes.
  • If that doesn’t work, file a restraining order. Yes you can get restraining orders for unwanted acts. Even against children. My son was assaulted so that defiantly warrants a restraining order.
  • Get involved in your community to bring attention to bullying and let it be known you won’t stand for it and will help others if needed.
  • See if there are other recourses in your area. Minnesota has School Safety Technical Assistance Center, They help schools develop programming and intervention practices to deal with bullying, and should be able to reach out to your child’s school to resolve the bullying.

I am not a parent who will stand by and let my child fear going to school. I have heard from others in the school (people who work there) that my son isn’t not the same, that he is quiet, he is reserved now and always watching his surroundings. This is not OK with me and I will be his advocate 100% until something is done. Don’t let your child be a victim to bullying. Listen to your children, watch for signs and talk to them.

ASD and the learning disability

Homework in our house can easily go one of two ways.
1) Not so well, relentless anger towards not understanding and not knowing how, what and when things have to be done.
2) Awesome and moving forward. ☺

For my little girl and her ASD with learning disability, we generally have a good experience  when it comes to doing homework. She loves to learn even when she doesn’t exactly get it. She enjoys coming and telling us about what she did or what she is doing in classes. She enjoys  showing us that she can do her homework. and she enjoys making us all so very proud to see her getting it.

Alyssa is amazing when it comes to repetitive understanding, such as the alphabet or counting in order. Those are the things she got down with no problems at all, but when you ask her to show you a letter within the alphabet, that’s when it becomes hard. The repetitive action is something she is used to, its routine or how it is just supposed to go. Taking a piece of that out and needing to understand  where that piece actually fits is the hard part.

We have a normal routine at the house, when dinner is over we sit at the table and work on what is in the very well-organized homework folder. (left side is homework and right side is finished work that has been corrected and ready to stay home and put away for the future) Every night is reading night, it does take some time to get through a book but we manage, and with Alyssa if it is taking to long the frustration will set in and could result in not so good behavior, so we take it in 10 minute increments. Work sheets on the other hand can be somewhat overwhelming, every weekend is a new worksheet with new material to learn.

Alyssa wants to badly to learn and be smart and she wants so badly to understand everything the human 7-year-old can.  She knows she has to try harder at things than other children in her class and she knows she will get it someday.

Homework.

Alyssa is a fighter, she is smart, she is determined and she is willing to learn, and with every struggle there is a reward, so all we can do is keep on trying.

Recess and Lunch with the Army!

Today my son got a very interesting surprise at his school. His big sister came to visit him for lunch. You are probably saying to yourself, ” no big deal, people have lunch with their family all the time at school”. Well this was no ordinary lunch.
Today my sons big sister brought some friends. Today was her day to stand up for her brother and let him know that he not only has her for support and friendship but her Cadre-family as well.
So she and a few of her Army unit personnel came to visit Jordan at his school. Jordan had no idea what was happening, just that out of no-where were 3 people dressed in uniform standing in the hallway front of his class, waiting to go out on the recess field and play some football. Was this exciting, of course it was,  there were kids everywhere who wanted to know why, who, where they came from, do they know someone? Then it was, WOW that’s Jordan’s sister and her friends……
Lunch was interesting, there were several questions from students pertaining to the military. There were a few stares and there was that nasty school lunch these tough guys wouldn’t even touch.

C360_2015-10-20-13-51-45-894

These men and this sister didn’t have to do it, but one thing I have learned from my daughter joining the military, These people come together for more then just training, they come together to be part of something good. They are our strength, our hope and our future.. 

Bruises go away, feelings don’t.

Let me tell you a little bit about my son. He is 11 years old and he is one of the gentlest little men I know. He is caring and he is smart. He isn’t aggressive but he is one to stand up for his friends and what is right. He doesn’t do this in a bad way, instead he does it in a verbal way by simply asking why? (Why did you push him? Why would you say that? Why are you being mean?)

My son has ADHD, he is the class clown. His teachers find him to be a delight in their classrooms and find that he is always smiling and making others feel good.

Last week this all changed. Last week I got a call from the school saying that he had been in a fight. I was told at first that he and the other boy were both at fault, that they were both suspended because they both contributed to punches. Now being as my son has never been in trouble at school and the fact that he is timid and non-aggressive, I had to question this. I asked him what happened and he wasn’t sure, he said he couldn’t remember how it started (at first). I spoke with the assistant principle and she has said she spoke with a few witnesses who said my son had thrown the first punch. (Again this is not my son)

Later we went home, went to football practice and then came home, when we got home there were kids from the neighborhood who came to check up on my son, they were concerned, and they had a different story. Its goes something like this, its recess and the kids were playing football. One kid played then left and then came back to play again. At this point the kids who continued playing the game said that he could not join at that moment because they were in the middle of the game and the teams were set and scores made. The boy got angry and went to get a few of his other friends. One kid pushed another kid and then, they explained that my son simply asked a kid why he had pushed another kid that then turned into words being exchanged and then my son walking back to the door to go to lunch. As my son was walking back to the door, a kid chased my son and pushed him to the ground, he proceeded to kick him and the got on top of him and punched him several times in the face until a teacher pulled him off of my son.

Does this sound like my son was throwing punches? Does this sound like my son was the aggressor? No it sounds to me that my son walked away.

I have come to find out that the other child is the same child who bullied my son in 2nd grade, the same child who tried to make my son lick a toilet in the school bathrooms. The same child my sons 2nd grade teacher had called me about to let me know that it was happening and that they were keeping an eye on the situation.

Well, the day after my son was suspended I spoke with the assistant principle again. I brought it to her attention that there are several other witnesses who claim a completely different story, Finding out by those same kids that the AP actually only spoke with the friends of the aggressor and not the kids who were there part of it from the beginning. I gave her the names of the kids and the story line that was given to me by several of the students. At that time my son’s teacher chimed in and said remarkable things about my son and that she herself couldn’t imaging my son being part of this situation.

I must say that I felt good knowing that others see what I see in my son. A good, boy with a heart of gold. A friend till the end and someone who doesn’t think violence is the answer.

My son’s suspension was removed!

Moving forward to this week, my son is hurt, he is down, things are being said at school by other kids about him getting “OWNED” “WEAK” “Can’t fight”. These are the friends of the other kid and I know kids can be mean to begin with. The problem I am having is that my son is afraid to tell a teacher or the AP. He doesn’t want to get the kids in trouble because it will fall back on him and it will get worse.

My son came home from school yesterday and lifted weights for an hour, then ran on the treadmill for an hour and a half. He feels now that if he gets a little bigger they won’t pick on him, that maybe next time he can stand up for himself and not be stuck on the ground.

I don’t want my child to feel this way. I don’t want my child to be afraid. I don’t want my child to think this is how life is. I don’t teach my children to fight. While I have taught them that words don’t hurt, in all actuality they do. I am an adult, I can brush words off and go on but a child who wants friends, a child who wants everyone to like them doesn’t feel the same.

2015-10-08

While his bruises will fade and go away, his self-esteem is shattered and all I can do is be there to protect him and stand up for him when he is afraid to.

Note: Today I call the school about the words being said to my child and ask that something be done.